I like ladyboys transsexual women t-girls am I gay?

I like ladyboys transsexual women t-girls am I gay?

Have you had sex with a ladyboy? Experienced after sex guilt? A recurring question, if I like ladyboys am I gay?* Technically, if you are attracted to transsexual women, t-girls, ladyboys, as they call them… You are not gay. Why? I know this short statement is not enough and it brings up internal conflicts, questioning your masculinity and sexuality and so on. Let’s go to find these answers

I know these feelings, I’ve been there just like you… I’m a man attracted to transsexual as well

Why do most people think being attracted to ladyboys is a homosexual attraction?

I’m sure you can find the answers your own, just look on the internet or read some books on sexual orientation and gender identity. But let me share with you what I learned trough the years and answer some questions. Here my friend Maki has something to tell us about sexual orientation and gender identity


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Most people tend to think that being attracted to transsexual girls pre-op or non-op (male to female ) is something like being homosexual. Because the common case about ladyboys pre-op, means they still have male genitalia. For these reasons you may feel somehow wrong with yourself, and worst case rejecting your attraction. But if you are like me… surely you are heading to depression if you keep denying who you are… a gay? No, you are not! This is the first mistake you do, and I also did in my teenage. I know just these words don’t make you feel any better. You need some better explanations, examples, and more answers! Then just read what’s following.

We need first to understand a bunch of things like:

  • Sexual orientations
  • Gender identity
  • Public opinion and social culture influence
  • Your personal knowledge

Most people think and say that you are gay if you like ladyboys right? That’s one fear you have when you like dating ladyboys! You give too much importance of what people could say about you. Stop minding ignorant people and get informed!

Public opinion and social culture influence

Some of us struggling to find answers all about these matters. Especially those guys who recognize their attraction to ladyboys and feeling they would be truly happy with a special girlfriend. Unfortunately, most of us are heavily conditioned by what people says. Who less who more, the social culture where we living play a big role. If you are westerner like me, grown with Catholic education, or living in some country where there are anti-gay laws ( like Russia ) and not same-sex marriage allowed… You are probably going to meet many people who will discriminate your sexual preferences or worse bully you and your ladyboy girlfriend! Even more influenced, if you are a straight man like me, and you don’t have any gay friend or transsexual, and you didn’t come out yet.

This was my scenario and what I’ve experienced in my teenage until I got acknowledge until I did coming out and stopped to mind what people would think or say about me! But one day I chose to be happy!

The fear of what people think and says

The fear of what people could think or tell you is what conditioning the way you to live your life, and preventing to live it to the fullest and happy! Even living in the recent years, where people are more respectful and tolerating, You may still find people who are yet in the past century mindset and taboo. These people may call you gay, pervert, or something like that if they know your sexual preferences or having a ladyboy girlfriend. Probably the biggest fear to face is telling that to your family and friends.

Can I make you feel a little better if I tell you that even ladyboys may face the same situation? We going to see that pretty soon! But…

First of all, let me tell you this again, you shall not consider yourself as Gay. Stick it in mid, next paragraph I will explain to you why even better.

The reasons we have seen till now most of the times are those that probably will make you stop looking for the girl of your dreams and living truly happy. Then, you somehow refuse your attraction and the worst case. Forcing yourself living with somebody who is not really what you wish to be with. Think how hilarious it is! Even ladyboys or transgender feel that way and may face the same problems. Let’s make an analogy.

Ladyboys, transgenders T-Girls forced to live trapped twice

I guess you heard already that ladyboys feel like women trapped in a man body?

There are ladyboys, or transgender living forced as gay man for the same reasons mentioned till now. Some transvestite or crossdresser may aspire to be transgender women, but for your same reason are forced to live in a different way. Could be even for family matters, your parents may be accepting you as gay, but not as ladyboy! Even at work, your boss may not accept transgenders!

Then, the fear of rejection, social discriminations, and problems to get a job can be the reasons that force you to live differently. If you now consider that their gender identity is feminine, and could end to live forced as gay guy, this what I call living life trapped twice

This is not right, for sure. Everybody deserve equal opportunities, respect, and chance to be happy. That’s one of the reasons why this blog exists. It is dedicated most to guys, but since I have today many friends who are ladyboys, I  hope these considerations will help both. I have been myself in a love relationship with ladyboys. I’ve experienced all of this, and of course, I was not feeling much ok until I got better informed and met good friends who are like me. I do hope, that knowing you are not alone, will give you some courage and make you feel a little better. Next!

Sexual orientations, trans-oriented man, pansexuality, third gender

So, if I’m not gay, what am I? Good question! It’s the same issue that tormented myself for a long time when I was a teenager. Have you ever heard the definitions or terms like trans-oriented man and pansexuality?

I guess you know already that ladyboy is just the familiar name to address transsexual women in Asia, from Thailand or Philippines for example. If you have been already in some Asian countries for work travel or holidays, probably you have noticed how different the LGBT is ( lesbo, gay, bi-sex, trans ) reality / scene compared to the west side of the world. In some countries like Thailand, transgender women are recognized as third-gender, and men who are attracted to ladyboys as a pansexual or trans-oriented man. (In coming weeks I’ll be writing something more about this culture and relative terms, Join my newsletter on the box below to don’t lose next! 😉 )

What do these terms stand for?

The Third Gender or Sex, ladyboys are not transvestites

That’s how ladyboys in Asia are recognized, as third sex or third gender. They are not transvestites or crossdresser. Ladyboys live their life as women 24 for 7 with pride, where instead crossdresser or travesties are more about following a sexual fantasy, as for gay people who like to dress female in intimacy playing the woman role. Of course, if you are used to seeing transsexuals in your west country, they may seem more masculine compared to their Asian sisters. Somehow this could make you confused because they look more like a cross-dresser or Drag Queen rather a ladyboy. For this case I’ll write a detailed article about the differences of being a transvestite and transsexual, and most important why being transsexual on the west side is tougher.

Gender Identity

Transgender and Transsexual are equivalent terms referring a person to gender identity that doesn’t match with their biological sex( though, there some small difference, will see those in another article). Many times transgender MTF may even look natural feminine, and gender identity is what influence their attitude, manners, mind, soul, and heart, which make them not less than any genetic woman. Becoming transsexual is just the need to adjust what nature did not give them at birth, and make their appearance match to their gender identity as woman!  And that’s how you should treat them always, and consider your special attraction.

Is then being ladyboy a choice?

YES and NOT! If you understood well till now, your question should be answered already. Have you ever heard about androgyny?  For my personal knowledge, the androgyny and transsexualism began with a genetic “anomaly“. It is not a disease. When in a male body the percentage of XX chromosome are above XY male one, is when the so-called “gender disorder” and androgyny appear. Then, being feminine is simply natural, and becoming transsexual is just the natural path to follow. The transition process is the courageous choice they make to live the life as who they are… women

I like ladyboys am I gay?

Even with all the explanations provided till now, the topic is Is always an open debate towards heterosexual communities and even LGBT. Questioning yourself about this matter is something really important to confront with. Understanding your sexual orientation, will help you to live a better life, and better love relationship with your future ladyboy girlfriend. More than most, you will learn the pure meaning of self-acceptance, and not minding anymore the stares and opinions of ignorant people.

If you feel somehow still affected by here, I have something else to tell you. Why you shall be not considering yourself gay.

I want to make you think now what’s following and find the answers your own. Do you like dating ladyboys because they are so feminine, sexy and passable? Don’t they turn you on and makes you feel so aroused and excited because they look like beautiful women? Not because they look like a man right? I guess this is already an enough reason you shouldn’t consider yourself gay.

They may still have their male genitalia, but this is just what’s make them so unique and extraordinary. You should accept this particular detail because this what makes them a woman of Third gender. You shouldn’t define your sexual orientation because of this small detail between her legs. On the other hand, if you are not attracted by muscles, hairy body, beard, male manners, and masculinity you are not gay.

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Posted in Ladyboy dating, Sexual orientation and tagged .

Andrea Del Riva, Italian man, 39 years, digital nomad, trans oriented man. I stand for transgender rights. Besides, I love Asia and my sweet ladyboy girlfriend. This blog is dedicated to who love to date ladyboys and travels in Asia. Im the author of this website, and others related to transsexual dating. You can find more about me on My Transsexual Girlfriend . I also collaborate with: Transsexual Date Online project.

18 Comments

  1. How a guy who love ladyboys can be gay? Most of them like them because they are very feminine and look like same than a woman.

    Do you feel attractive to another guy? If not, sure you are not gay.

    Enjoy, Ladyboys are the best best girlfriend I never have.

  2. Thanks for sharing your thoughts Kalvin 🙂 Unfortunately there are still many in our society who doesn’t the meaning of gender identity and sexual orientation.

    There is people who live yet in the past century, and all these terms are something vague or totally unknown to most.

    I remember the slogan that began in 2014 by some transgender community which was ” My gender identity has nothing to do with my genitalia”.
    Thanks to Maki Gingoyon , Geena Rocero and many other trans advocates, and the support of Asian Transgender community, something important is started.
    I’m positive for the future 🙂

  3. Tell me how’s liking female look alike with dick hanging out not consider gay. They have no vagina to begin with. How do u fuck these ladyboys ? anus. It’s because u also enjoy penis and anal. Therefore, u people are a bunch of gay fucks. I’m not a religious freak but Wdf
    What has the world come down to? There are trannies , gays, lesbians and now a fucking ladyboy? Somewhere halfway couldn’t afford to get full surgery. If ur gonna be a fucking feminine and want to keep ur dick? That makes no sense because if u want to be so girly u would hate the extra part. Why are people become such a psychotic freaks with many different fetishes. It really sicken me that these things existed and guys like u people find it pleasurable.

    • This blog, like other about the same topic, exist also for people like you. People who are still living in the past century. Who are convinced to know how to make the best world possible, even though they are quite ignorant just like your sentences.
      But let me ask you this: “Who are you to dictate what is wrong or right in this world?”

      You are asking ” What this world has come down to ?” Then I ask you in what era are you living? Because today we are in 2015, and sodomy or as gay lesbian exist since the ” Homo Sapiens” Learned to walk on this planet. Further more, gay sex exists also in the Animal world. And you wondering in what world are you living?

      Unfortunately, we live in a non-perfect world, and LGBT community has to live also with ignorant people like you, who know nothing about the world they living at.

      However, thanks for the remarks. As I mentioned earlier, I making this blog also for people like you

    • If people are comfortable with a ladyboy, and they can be very attractive and feminine and, best of all, fun to be with, it’s nobody’s business. If you don’t understand the attraction ladyboys can have for some men, and I can appreciate them, just accept this as a fact and move on. To each his/her own, life is just too short to get your knickers in a twist for things that don’t really concern you. I don’t understand guys having the hots for fat women, but why should I disapprove?

      • Just wanted to say that’s a great answer: Life on this spinning blue marble IS too short to denigrate anyone else’s choice or to worry about what dumbfucks say about another’s choice.
        As the Latin Americans say, “Carpe Diem,” which translates roughly to “Seriously, I have to listen to idiots telling me where I should stick my penis?”

        The above was not meant to be a factual statement, and I hope everyone takes it in the spirit in which it was meant.

  4. Hi I am extremely, attracted to transsexuals, how ever I need some ,, truth advice, I am extremely attracted to a good looking CD, that I know is male but has a cute feminine face.. Basically,, a girls face on a non masculine male body, I love all the male parts.. I have been married 20 years and when I am having sex, I visually in my mind, am having or receiving sex from a cute girl, what is your thoughts about me,, please give me some advice , sincerely Richard Odom 🙂

    • You like what you like. Having been married for 20 years, I would say you should consider the non-sexual aspect of your relationship and weigh it against what your heart wants.
      And if it falls toward the latter, just rip the bandage off and allow both of you to get on with your lives as quickly as possible.

  5. I personally do not see the point in acting negatively towards someone just because they are not genetically male or female. Also the same goes for Sexual Orientation & Attraction, except the one difference in it is that it’s each person’s choice (& every other person can only have an opinion on it, which shouldn’t matter). I strongly believe in Equality both of Gender & Orientation. I’m attracted to Transsexuals as well as Genetic Females, the only difference is in the Genetic point of it but not in who they are as people (to me they are BOTH Female).. yet I still consider myself Straight (because I know i’m not attracted to Males & therefor I can’t be Bi-Sexual). The way I see it- Sexual Orientation is a natural feeling that is followed up by a choice. People can feel one way (or multiple ways), but then it is their choice as to what they show others or how they act. I also feel that just because i’m attracted to Transsexuals, there’s no reason to “tell the world” about it, it should just be between me & the person I would be with at the point in time that it would pertain to (i’m currently single).

    • Thanks for sharing, James! My apologies for the late comment. Well, the “coming out” it is a good thing at the eye of your ladyboy girlfriend. Since she lives every day as she wishes to be, without minding what people may say of her, on the other hand, having a boyfriend who is proud and courageous as much as she is, indeed it is much appreciated by her side. Of course, there is no need to shout it loud, or make a blog like mine and tell your story. We all have different reasons and motivations for what we do or don’t, what matters is that we are happy with who we like and love.

  6. Thank you so much for this blog! It has helped me loads. I myself have recently met a ladyboy and she is the most amazing person I have ever met in 45 years of my life.
    I am a very open minded person and always have been. Have been through so many failed relationships with women but there was always something wrong with the relationship itself.
    I have never been attracted to men and always women.
    Anyway, I met this girl (ladyboy…though I see her as a woman) and have fallen in love. I haven’t felt like this in a long time but then started asking myself those questions…”hang on, does that mean I’m gay?” kind of questions.
    After reading this blog, it all sounds so right. It makes absolute sense (so much so, I’m incensed to respond to it 🙂 )
    I’m not gay, I’m interested in the female. She’s a girl in my mind, she’s beautiful and thoughtful and funny and kind. Yes, she has a penis but that’s not what’s attracting me to her. It’s the person she is, her soul. We haven’t made love yet (being respectful) but when we do, I know it’s going to be the most amazing thing ever and really looking forward to it.
    It’s nice to know I’m not the only one out there that has asked these questions and hopefully found answers too.

    Thanks again, so much for this blog. Keep up the great work!

    • Glad to hear it helped you @Stu and four your love story. I wish you all the best for the future! If you like to share more privately, feel free to send me an email, it’s a pleasure 🙂

  7. Men attracted to transwomen are not gay, they’re gynandromorphophilc — which basically just means they like TS. They do appear to fall into at least 2 different categories but neither is gay. They’re not attracted to men. There have been a couple of studies, I’ve just seen one as yet unpublished, but here’s a link to an earlier one: http://d-miller.github.io/assets/HsuEtAl2015.pdf
    Be warned, it’s a scientific paper so it’s not a light read, but just skip to the discussion.

    • Thanks for the contribute Rod, it’s always appreciated, and is good to extend the topic.

      I’m aware of the “gynandromorphophilc” definition, but I prefer to use a simple approach on my blog to make it easier to read and understand.

      Just like you said, it’s like a brick to read, but for those who wish to get further explanation on a scientific matter, there will be the satisfaction 🙂

  8. I find that the beautiful young slender ladyboys are sexy and very arousing I love their femininity and the ones who have a beautiful **** are so much more appealing than some washed out fat women. For me its a fantasy i have not yet if ever i will act on. Seeking the kind of ladyboy i would actually have encounter with is to hard to find, occasionally i will see some 40 to 55 year old has been wannabe ladyman that is repulsive in a store mostly. but that is gross rather just masturbate to ladyboy porn or have real girlfriend even if she is a little fat better that being alone in life… Asian women and ladyboys are the sexiest best

  9. Im very attracted to asian ladyboy/shemale/femboy types,especially if they are slim,are pretty and are more feminine and submissive….as i have never been with a ladyboy i dont know if im gay or not..i tried one time with a asian gay type guy,but afterwards felt repulsed and guilty and never repeated that again..im afraid to express my feelings to anyone because they will see me as a gay..

    • Fear not, Rob! Are all very common feelings, I can relate very well. I’d invite you to take a look at this bio of myself, where I describe the matter, what I’ve been through, and most important, how to get over it! Take a look here at, a Trans-Oriented man comes out! Let me know and thanks for sharing! 🙂

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